Through Tears Comes Wisdom

She must have cried herself to sleep every night for seventeen months. That's at least how long it would have taken me to put my words onto paper without falling apart.

I am referring to an article I was offered to read. This article was written by a mother whose son has Tay-Sachs disease. A child with this horrendous disease rarely lives to see their third birthday. This woman's son is now 18 months old. Here is the direct link for those who choose to read it: http://www.nytimes.com/2011/10/16/opinion/sunday/notes-from-a-dragon-mom.html?src=tp&smid=fb-share. Be warned...have a tissue box in hand. For those who choose not to read the article, I will summarize for you.

Emily Rapp, is a professor of creative writing at the Santa Fe University of Art and Design. She tells how she had genetic testing for Tay-Sachs, not once, but twice. Both times the results were negative. None of the prenatal testing came back positive. Emily and her husband were excited, looking forward to a happy, healthy baby. They read all the prenatal books to ensure that they would make the best choices for their baby. I can certainly relate. Both my husband and I had $3,000 worth of every genetic test available. We came out with 100% perfect results. Like Rapp, we did the same thing. We read the best books, were staunch advocates for breast feeding, I even put ear phones on my belly for an hour each day, playing classical music while I napped (my son was calmest when Vivaldi or Bach was played). My son was such a sleepy, quiet baby, that at one of my prenatal check-ups, it took almost three hours! The technician needed to take important measurements and my son just would not move. She even called in the doctor, who straddled me and massaged my abdomen to get my son to move. Again, no luck. I ended up having to come back the next day. Thank goodness my son was much more cooperative then.

I look back on my pregnancy, as Rapp must have, with spinning mobiles and fancy bedding dancing in my head. I fantasized about holding my baby in a sling as I did errands, completely non-sleep deprived (I did say it was a fantasy). I was eagerly looking forward to a perfect baby in every way, as I'm sure Rapp was.

I'm not sure when Rapp was given the diagnosis of her son's condition. I do know that the nightmare I had with my son began during labor and only started to wind down about two years ago, once all of my son's disorders were finally identified. My son was six then. Six completely draining years. Six years of ineffective bonding. I regret those six years. But I have developed such an incredibly strong, impenetrable bond with my 8 year-old son, it is as if those first six years never happened. My son doesn't remember. Unfortunately I always will. 

 As I was up with my baby son multiple times per night, with his colic and reflux, for just about three years, I can imagine Rapp welcoming watching her son sleep at night, sighing in his sleep and reaching out to pick him up if he needed comforting. What I viewed as torture, to Rapp would have been, and probably is, the loveliest time of her day. As my son easily had a good twenty-five meltdowns a day, starting at eleven months old, Rapp would probably have embraced laughingly that her son still had so much vigor and fight left in him. When my 18-month old flung his plate of spaghetti and sauce across the kitchen, splattering every wall, floor, and 2 dogs, and I wanted to slide down into a heap and cry. Rapp is probably flinging spaghetti herself, just to hear more laughter come from her son.

Looking back, I wish that I was aware of each of my son's disorders when he was a baby. I blamed myself for my son's uncontrollable nature and didn't realize I had prolonged postpartum depression. I would have forgiven him as well as myself for our lack of bonding those first young years. Rapp is giving her son a gift. A gift he will never be aware of, but she will. And the grief and pain will probably never fully dissipate. But the knowledge that she spent every waking moment (and unslept moment) being fully with her child, must fill her with even a small amount of gratitude. She gave of herself completely. Without self-pity or repressed anger. That is what makes her story so special. She asks the question: How do you parent a child who has no future? You don't. You throw the "rules" out the window and make each day more special than the day before.

She must have cried a bucket full of tears. I know I have. But I still have my precious son with me. She does too. But only for a little while longer.

Cara's Fabulous Finds

Lisa Damiani's

StarRock for Kids

1989 Star Search Winner, Lisa Diamani, created a premiere CD compilation featuring kids ages five to seventeen! These talented kids sing hits from past decades to today's hottest songs!

Curator of talent and Founder/CEO Lisa Diamani wanted to create a platform to provide all children an equal opportunity to express their creativity regardless of economical or geographical challenges. 

As a top vocal coach in NYC, Diamani hopes that StarRock for Kids will encourage both introverted and extroverted children a way to pursue their dreams. Lisa says, "I wanted to create StarRock for Kids not as a talent competition, but as a way for children to gain confidence and express their creativity."

StarRock for Kids CD features 18 songs from various decades, including S.O.S. (Rihanna), Holiday (Madonna), It's a Beautiful Life (Ace of Base), Girlfriend (Avril Levigne), Makes Me Wonder (Maroon 5), You Make Me Feel So Young (Frank Sinatra), If I Can't Have You (Yvonne Elliman), and L-O-V-E (Nat King Cole).

I listened to the CD with my eight-year-old son and his music loving friend. Although they performed their own "moves" to all of the songs, they particularly enjoyed, "See You Later Alligator", "Boogie Oogie Oogie", "We Got the Beat", and "Funkytown". Command performances were requested for each of these favorites! I am sure girls would choose more emotional songs. The CD as a whole was a hit with my son and his friend! I would definitely use it for my son's next party or special event!

StarRock for Kids is available online at www.StarRockForKids.com or at major retailers such as Target and Walmart.

Z-Access 3D Display Frames

Have you ever wanted to display souvenirs, keepsakes or other memorabilia, but have found that traditional shadowboxes just don't work? Then the 3D Display Frames are just for you!

Z-access Display Frames allow you to showcase your most treasured items in full 3D. Your items are safely protected against dust, moisture or fingerprints. With innovative polymer film technology along with do-it-yourself simple assembly, the Z-Access Display Frames suspend your special items in an affordable, moisture resistant, worry-free way. The slightly tacky film stretches to fit a wide range of shapes and sizes. It is puncture resistant, will not damage delicate surfaces and leaves no sticky residue.

My son collects real shark teeth. He has 2 large ones that were just sitting on his shelf, collecting dusk, with no place to meaningfully display them. I placed them in the Z-Access 3D Frame. We now have his treasured shark teeth, suspended in a frame that allows him to see all sides of them! (See photo). No more clutter, mess or dust! I would like to buy more frames to use for several of his other "treasures"!

What is even better is the fact that the Z-Access Display Frames conform to virtually any shape and still afford a tactile experience without any damage to the item itself. And, unlike shadowboxes, the Z-Access Display Frame allows you to touch the items and feel their unique texture without the risk of damage.

Each 6" x 4" frame can hold up to three pounds. It also couldn't be simpler to use: open the frame, place your item inside the film and close the frame. If you want to change the item in the frame, just pop open the frame and swap out the items. The memory-film will reshape to fit almost any new item of similar depth. The film inserts can also be replaced, with no need to replace the entire frame.

Z-Access Display Frames are available in three models: a Stand Alone version with a fixed base for $12.99, a Slimline rotating frame-within-a-frame for 360 degree viewing for $16.99 and an Executive rotating frame-within-a-frame for $29.99.

For more information, or to purchase a Z-Access Display Frame, visit www.Displayit3D.com.

Company Kids / Backpack Giveaway

Company Kids is very graciously giving our readers a chance to win a child’s backpack! Even though school is in session, I know that a Mom can never enough of anything when it comes to kids! In fact, just last week, my son’s backpack was dangling from the kitchen chair and water had pooled underneath. When I looked closer, I found the dripping coming from the bottom of my son’s backpack! His water bottle was not closed fully and was on it’s side, soaking the bottom of his backpack. Out came my spare for him to use the next day while this one dried!

Children also need different backpacks for events they participate in. Sometimes they simply forgot to bring it home from school. Others simply wear out by mid-year.

I was able to to see one of the actual backpacks being used for the Giveaway. I was highly impressed! The backpacks are high quality, durable canvas. It comes with adjustable straps, side and front pockets, even a small pouch inside for change or small items to tuck away! It can also be personalized with a monogram from a variety of fonts and colors to choose from!

To enter this giveaway, tell us why you would like a Company Kids backpack and how old your child(ren) are. You must post a comment by October 30, 2011 to be entered to win. Winners will be chosen at random.

Good luck!

Cara's Books That Beckon

Pirates and Princesses

By

Jill Kargman and Daughter, Sadie

This story of friendship and the playground, was written by NY Times Best Selling Author, Jill Kargman, her 8-year-old daughter Sadie, and NY Times Best Selling Illustrator, Christine Davenier, as an energetic tale all youngsters will be able to relate to. 

When Jill's daughter, Sadie, was insulted by a boy on the playground, she let loose an inappropriate verbal comeback. Jill was called in by the teacher. It was suggested that both Jill and Sadie sit down to read a rather boring book about mice and cheese, which emphasized how to play nicely. Both Jill and Sadie found the book so boring that they decided to write their own book together! A fabulous teaching experience for a child! Thus Pirates and Princesses was born.

Pirates and Princesses begins with a pair of Moms who are best friends, and their same age children. The young children of these Moms are also best friends since they grew up together. Once the children, Ivy and Fletch, enter Kindergarten, they face their first taste of peer pressure: The girls only play with the girls while the boys only play with the boys. Thus, Ivy and Fletch are separated by the Princess Team versus the Pirate Team. Once Fletch steps in to rescue Princess Ivy from a pirate capture do the friends realize how much they have missed playing with one another. But will their special bond be strong enough to unite the rest of the playground?

I read this book with my 8-year-old son who could relate to the storyline. He has a friend he has known since he was two-years-old, named Elena. The two are still close friends and have frequent playdates. I sense, however, that unless their activities involve gender neutral activities, they also will be caught in peer pressured scenarios. Although, both are active and playful, my son is slowly gravitating towards Beyblades and Star Wars while I am sure Elena is cuddling her favorite toys. I am still holding out hope that, like Ivy and Fletch, my son and Elena will continue to delight in each other's company despite gender differences on the playground!

Best selling author, Jill Kargman, paired with her daughter, Sadie and the beautiful, endearing artwork of Christine Davenier, bring to readers the light-hearted tale of gender differences, the unforgettable lesson of open-mindedness, and the breaking down of barriers in this lovely book. Pirates and Princesses will surely resonate with both children and parents alike!

About the Author: 

Jill Kargman has written several novels for women and teens, as well as more than 100 articles for magazines such as Vogue, Elle, Teen Vogue, and Harper's Bazaar, and several shows for MTV. Written with her daughter, Sadie, Pirates and Princesses is her first children's picture book. Her website is: www.jillkargman.com.

About the Illustrator:

Christine Davenier has illustrated numerous books, the most recent being the NY Times bestseller, The Very Fairy Princess.

The Bedtime Book for Dogs

By

Bruce Littlefield

"The Bedtime Book for Dogs," written by Bruce Littlefield is a unique and sweet, one-of-a-kind story that has been getting buzz both in and out of the kennel! This light-hearted, cute book is particularly appropriate for anyone who is a dog lover, especially dog loving children!

In this very original and delightful book, bestselling author, Bruce Littlefield introduces a first of it's kind story to read to your dog (as well as your child) before bed.

"The Bedtime Book for Dogs" describes a rather intelligent dog who decides that he would rather walk to the park by himself than wait for his owner. During this adventure, this dog finds that going for a walk by yourself is just not as exciting as walking with a friend.

I first had my 8 year-old son read the book by himself. We then mutually decided to read this lovely book to one of our dogs. The average dog knows approximately 167 words. We know our dog, Maxi, is way smarter than average and has gone to training classes when he was young. We used the book to guide Maxi to go to his bed and lie down. Maxi complied. My son then proceeded to read the book to Maxi. As Maxi listened attentively (probably hoping for a treat in the end), my son followed the book's "instructions" to prime Maxi to pay attention (again, hoping for a treat!). When the book mentioned that the dog fetched his own leash and opened the door himself (both which Maxi has demonstrated in the past, to our amazement!), my son started rolling on the floor in laughter, recalling the times Maxi has tried to "walk himself!" At the end of the book, Maxi was praised for being such a good listener and received his treat! My son received a face full of kisses! Happiness abound!

This engaging book, with adorable illustrations by Paul S. Heath, is a perfect gift for dog lovers! An easy to read book, with words dogs will understand, such as "come" and "sit,"  "The Bedtime Book for Dogs" will have children reading to their pets again and again! I can certainly attest to that as my reluctant reader son has made reading this book to our dog practically an every night ritual! Since our dog knows that a treat will be presented at the end, he is quite a willing participant!

Bruce Littlefield is a bestselling author of books on American culture such as Garage Sale America and Merry Christmas, America. You can visit his website at www.brucelittlefield.com.

For more information about,"The Bedtime Book for Dogs," you can go Grand Central Publishing's website, www.hachettebookgroup.com.

This book is easy enough for early readers to read and comprehend. Cute enough for older readers to relate to. And adorable enough for both dogs and adults to appreciate! Particularly when treats are provided at the end!

Professor Wormbog

in Search for the

Zipperump-a-Zoo

By

Mercer Mayer

The very first thing that my eight year-old son mentioned about this book was that the illustrations very closely reminded him of his favorite book, "Where the Wild Things Are," by Maurice Sendak. I absolutely agree. This may be one of the reasons my son found "Professor Wormbog" so engaging.

"Professor Wormbog in Search for the Zipperump-a-Zoo” is a timeless book written by beloved children's author Mercer Mayer who is known for his "Little Monster" and "Little Critters" series.

Mayer's books, with their cute, lovable characters, go through situations that every child experiences. "Professor Wormbog" follows this theme. It tells the story of how difficult it is to find a Zipperump-a-Zoo. Professor Wormbog has collected a Kerploppus, an Ickky and a Useless. Every beastie except for a Zipperump-a-Zoo. Mayer creates a world of silly creatures filled with humor for both children as well as adults. My eight year-old son read it and found the tale very engaging. As stated above, he continually referenced that the illustrations, closely resembling those of "Where the Wild Things Are," drew him into the "Professor Wormbog" story even more. This classic collectable is one that should be found on every child's bookshelf! I also think my son found a new favorite book to read!

This re-released edition of the book, available through Fastpencil PREMIERE Publishing's website, http://bit.ly/nyGbjF, is the first of many books which will be published through the "Classic Collectibles" line.

 "Professor Wormbog" can be purchased through the website: 

http://premiere.fastpencil.com/wormbog.

Suggested reading age: 7+

The story can be read to children who are younger than this suggested reading age.