My Son...The Treasurer?

My son is a natural born leader. I don’t say this just to puff myself up. In fact, I envy his innate abilities. I’ve witnessed his talents since he was a toddler. The kid just has what it takes. You can spot it a mile away.

His elementary school decided to form a Student Government. Two children from the 3rd, 4th and 5th grades were chosen to form the committee. I asked my son’s teacher how it came to be that my son was chosen. She said that first each 3rd grade class had to nominate one person. Then the individual class nominees were up for democratic voting by all of their 3rd grade peers. My son won! What an incredible honor! I can’t even think of two kids I was even close to when I was in 3rd grade!

It didn’t surprise me that my son was chosen. The kid can make friends with a tree. What did surprise me was that my son has learning disorders and the school administration is still allowing my son to participate. I give the school kudos. Especially since it took two agonizing years to get special services for my son.

My son is beyond elated! He was dressed and ready to go to his first meeting last week an hour ahead of schedule. He nagged us to go to the school before it was even open! He glowed when he told us how his first meeting went. A plethora of creative ideas for various goals were spewing out of my son’s mouth so fast, I thought he would pass out from not taking a breath! Now the Student Government must decide a President, Secretary and Treasurer. Only fifth graders are allowed to run for President; fourth graders for Secretary and third graders for Treasurer. Guess who wants to run for Treasurer?

My son has no problems with math or money comprehension. Thankfully, math is one area he excels at. My only fear for him is that he has to write a speech to present to his peers explaining why he should be chosen as Treasurer. A speech. Something you have to write. An area where all of his deficits lie.

We engaged his tutor to help him with his speech. It is basic. Not terribly convincing. However, I can visualize my son making this rather dry speech into something completely engaging. He has that “gift.”

I, the “Free Range Mom” who practically throws my son out of the nest, shouting, “Go for it!” am a little apprehensive for my son. He is getting better at dealing with failure. Yet, he is so convinced that he will be chosen as Treasurer, that if he is not chosen, I will be wondering whether it is because of his learning deficits. I would never relay these fears of mine to him. But I will be thinking of it. A lot.

I should, and am so grateful that my son was nominated and chosen to represent his class. He has myriad ideas about fundraising, raising money for charities, inspiring more “school spirit,” etc. He will be a perfect asset to the Student Government regardless whether he wins as Treasurer or not. Still, that nagging doubt will remain in the back of my head if he does not get chosen.

I want my son to win as Treasurer. I want him to win because I know he can carry out his responsibilities and be a highly enthusiastic part of the team. I want him to win because even though his writing and reading are sub-par, he can still show the world that he can accomplish what he sets his mind to regardless of his deficits. I want the school to see that regardless of “disabilities,” there are many ways a child can prove their value and worthiness. I want him to continue to nurture his amazing, innate characteristics! They have gotten him quite far in his short life. I want them to take him to the moon and back. And just possibly, to the Presidency!

I’ll be keeping my fingers crossed. Toes too! You go, kid!!

Chore Chart

Now that the holidays are behind us, and some routines for your child may have "relaxed" during this time, it is a terrific time to re-establish more structure for your family. To help your family get back on track and start the New Year off right, we came upon just the right solution for you!

I was excited to be invited to try out an online scheduling site called, "GoalForIt." This excellent online resource provides a variety of free solutions for personal success that are easy to use and can help bring more focus, balance and fulfillment into everyday living. I particularly love their simple-to-use Chore Chart, which can help children of all ages learn essential skills in a fun and rewarding way.

This FREE Chore Chart can help teach kids, tweens & teens many important lessons, including:

Responsibility:

Chore Chart is an ideal way to help your kids feel like they are making a contribution to their family by doing their part around the house.

Understanding right from wrong:

Setting behavior goals is an important way to help children strengthen their character and judgment.

Healthy Habits:

Teaching good habits involving nutrition and physical activity are the cornerstone of preventing obesity in children and adolescents.

Money Matters:

The optional point system teaches children three important lessons for managing money; earning, spending and saving.

I went to the site and set up my personal account. My focus was to make up a Chore Chart that my son could reasonably follow. This site is incredibly simple to use. To create a personalized chart, you choose a "background" that you or your child likes. You then go to the category options (ie. chores, behavior, healthy eating, etc.) and click on the goals that you would like to see on your chart. I was able to combine one chart to include not only chores, but also behavior goals and healthy habits. Then I selected how many times per week I thought my son could reasonably achieve these goals on a daily and weekly basis. This allowed both of us to see the big picture of how well my son was able to successfully carry out his goals. That's it! I made one up in just a few minutes. I had the option to print out the charts for a few weeks, complete with dates, enter the daily information directly to the website, or do a combination of both.

Once the chart was completed for the day, I had the option of entering how well my son did onto the website on a daily basis or at any other point in time. This process took virtually just a couple minutes. We would click on the appropriate day and goal. Then my son got to choose which type of “sticker” he could apply to that goal once it was finished. At the end of the week, I could print out a summary to review with my son. We could easily see where he would be rewarded or given a chance to try harder to complete the goals for the next week. We could even go back into the site and modify goals that we felt were more unreasonable for my son to achieve. There is even a “Moolah” button you can use to “bank” points for actual money. Overall, it was a fun, interactive way to work with your child to both empower him/her or to set and achieve reasonable goals. The site also offers suggestions about both rewarding your child or working on ways for your child to be more responsible for his/her goals.

My son was able to easily achieve most of the goals I set up for him. As he becomes better at being able to meet all of his goals, we can then collaborate together and work on either increasing the number of times he would need to meet a goal per week or add additional categories to his chart. We can even create our own personal goals. The Chore Chart is completely customizable and flexible.

I plan to continue to use the Chore Chart system! With it's ease of use and completely customizable system, I even want to make up a chart for myself! The website is user-friendly, simple to use and best of all...it WORKS!

Try it out with your family. Not only is it FREE, but it is simple to use. Best of all, my son actually likes it! With any child, that is half the battle! 

Here's to 2012 — by Margaret Hart

This is my first blog in the New Year, and I'd like to write something meaningful and inspirational, but I'm finding myself to be somewhat at a loss for words. I'm sort of temporarily tapped out.  Since early November, I've been running around like a chicken with my head cut off getting ready for this and that, and now that the excitement of all the holidays is over, the company has left, and my son goes back to school tomorrow, there is a satisfying lull in my routine. I have nothing urgent on my calendar until February. And I'm liking this peaceful time of nothing pressing to do.  

Like most people, however, I am thinking about what I'd like to accomplish this year. My to-do list is always a mile long, but there are a few must-do priorities at the top. I'm not a "resolutions" type of person, I'm a goals and priorities gal, and one of the top goals is to continue to make my health a priority. As many moms know, we often put ourselves second or third to our children, our husbands, our jobs, and our pets. I made a conscious decision in 2010 to make myself a priority and started working out with a trainer and seeing a nutritionist. Thankfully, my husband is supportive and my son, who is the most health conscious seven-year-old I know, rarely wants to eat anything fattening or sugary, so I get a lot of support in my household.

Another big priority is to continue to focus on the next phase in my career, which I voluntarily stepped away from when my son was born. While he's been growing, I've enjoyed freelancing at my own pace, providing me with the flexibility to be a full-time mom.  Now that my son is becoming more and more independent, the economy is picking up, and I am seeing more opportunities, I am reviewing my options. Many of the stay-at-home moms I met last year when my son entered Kindergarten have gone back to work; some out of necessity, and others because they missed being in the workforce. I am torn.  I miss being in the workforce. But I know I'll miss being a full-time mom.  And I'm scared at the prospect of relinquishing control to a nanny.  I'll just have to cross that bridge when I come to it.

One of the biggest challenges I expect to face this year is taking on guardianship of my younger sister who  has down's syndrome and currently lives in a group home near my parents in Maine.  My parents are now in their early 70s, and it's getting harder for them to supervise her care. It's time for me to step into a role I have been anticipating for many years.  I'll be overseeing her transition to a group home in Connecticut, and becoming her full-time guardian ensuring all  her needs are met.  Fortunately, she is high functioning, relatively independent, and social, so I'm hopeful she will be happy making new friends and getting involved in  new activities. 

I'm looking forward to 2012 being a year of positive change for me and my family.  And even though I say every  year that I'm going to slow down, not take on so many projects, and try not to do too much, I know that I will. It's in my nature. If  I'm not running around with my  hair on fire, I'm bored. 

So here's to the New Year!  As my son likes to say, "Go like the wind Bulls Eye."